Call Me A Biscuit #socs

Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

I had a friend whose favorite expression was "well, butter my buns and call me a biscuit." It sounds dirty, but when you think about it, it isn’t. Not too dirty, anyway.

In our much-younger days, I used to buy margarine instead of butter, and discovered (a) it tastes worse and (b) butter isn’t that much more expensive. And when I learned that margarine was all trans fats, I decided that, in the long run, we were better off having butter.

Mom was seven when World War II broke out, and she said you couldn’t buy butter, which they were told was all being sent overseas for the troops fighting. She said that margarine was white and came with a packet of what was essentially food coloring that you could blend into the margarine to make it look like butter. Sounds even more gross than margarine already is.

They had to substitute for coffee then, too, usually with chicory. I’ve never tasted it, but it’s supposedly a reasonable facsimile of the real thing. When all the men came home from overseas, I guess they preferred instant coffee to ground coffee, because that’s what they had in their rations. If that’s the case, why did they advertise that a brand of instant was more like fresh-brewed, if instant was superior, at least to their taste buds?

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now here are SeƱor Wences and Johnny for Parkay margarine.

The #socs Jukebox

Maggie’s already given you the Johnny Mathis version of "Misty," so I’ll give you the original, by Erroll Garner…

My favorite version is the one by Ray Stevens…

Long as I’m in a misty mood, Jerry Wallace with "In The Misty Moonlight"…

The opposite of "misty" (sorta, anyway) is dusty, as in Dusty Springfield, who we heard from earlier this week. Here she is with the beautiful Bacharach/David song, "Anyone Who Had A Heart"…

All this music is making me thirsty. Here’s John Lee Hooker with "One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer."

Yep, couldn’t think of anything to write…

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now a word about Silvikrin shampoo. Puts new pep into tired hair!

This Is Gonna Hurt… #socs

I apologize in advance for any pain you might experience reading this…

The most excruciating nerve pain I have ever experienced was the time when one of the muscles in my groin trapped one of the nerves down there. This had been bothering me all day, and when I tried to lie down, it was so tight that I was afraid to, because I knew it would make the muscle tighten up more and trap the nerve even further, and it was going to hurt like hell.

I sat on the edge of the bed and tried easing myself into a supine position, and it tugged and started to hurt, and I sat back up. I did this multiple times over two hours, hoping that the megadose of naproxen sodium I take every night would kick in and maybe loosen things up enough to where I could lie down and it wouldn’t hurt as much, but that wasn’t happening.

Finally, I was tired enough and pissed off enough that I said, "I know this is going to hurt like hell, but I’m just going to lie down really fast and maybe, just maybe, it’ll be enough to yank the nerve out from under the muscle." I took a deep breath, counted to three, and threw myself back on the bed.

It was all I could do to keep from screaming and waking up the neighborhood. I saw stars for a good five minutes. Gradually, the pain lessened. I tried to move my leg, and it was fine. I guess the sudden movement did yank the nerve out from under the muscle.

Then I got mad at myself. I reasoned that it would have hurt just as much two hours earlier, and I should have just sucked it up and done it then. I was too tired to continue with berating myself, rolled over and went to sleep.

(Yes, I know: Childbirth is worse….)

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now a word about Robert Burns Cigarillos. Remember, if it’s not by Robert Burns, it’s not a real cigarillo!

Can You Tell Me How To Get… #socs

I heard the prompt "above" and "below" and immediately thought of Sesame Street

I used to watch Sesame Street with my then baby brother. My then baby brother is now 45 and towers above me, and has two sons who look like they tower above him.

There are times I miss flying. Sometimes I’d get a window seat and look out the window at the cities, towns and countryside below me. I’m surprised to see just how well laid-out farmland is into squares and rectangles. That was during the day, of course; at night, everything was dark. Sometimes you’d fly over a highway that was lit up, and then a town where there would be some lights so you could see what was there, but mostly just a lot of dark, with maybe a little light sprouting out of nowhere.

Then there were times we’d fly above the clouds, and you’d look down and see nothing but white. The sky up there is the brightest blue I’ve ever seen. To land, of course, we’d have to fly through the clouds, sometimes for more than a couple of minutes before descending below the clouds. That’s when you’d see what the weather was like, whether it was raining or just overcast.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now a word about Pall Mall cigarettes. Outstanding! And… they are mild!

"Over, under, around and through…" Would have been nice if it was "above, below, arouund and through…" Oh well…

Call Before You Dig #socs

We have been having a lot of underground maintenance done, and any time that happens we have little yellow and orange flags pop up along the street like dandelions, along with color-coordinated spray paint that shows where the gas (yellow flags) and electric (orange flags) lines are. Sometimes the flags show up and it doesn’t appear that they’ve done any actual work in the neighborhood, but we’re hesitant to move the flags anyway, because they might need to know where things are for some time in the future. After about three months, we generally figure they won’t be back and feel comfortable pulling the flags up, particularly when there aren’t any utility trucks in the neighborhood.

We’re lucky in our subdivision because the electrical lines are buried rather being held aboveground by utility poles, like they are in the subdivision behind us. Having the electrical lines underground means there’s less of a chance that lightning will hit them and knock the power out. We have never really had a major power outage at our house. The electricity has gone out on occasion, but doesn’t stay out for hours at a time.

We don’t really give much thought to the electricity otherwise. It just always seems to be there. When it isn’t, we have battery-powered radios just in case, plus I keep a couple of power packs charged up so we can charge our phones and run some small appliances. Which reminds me, I really should get a couple more of them to have on hand…

Stream of consciousness Saturda is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now, here are Bob Cummings and Julie Bishop for Dunhill cigarettes, cork tip or plain end!